Monday, September 11, 2006

Feeling the Nostalgia of Fall

I will remember you.
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories.
...excerpt from Sarah McLachlan's song I Will Remember You

Andrew and I have recently been talking about how some of the truly wonderful times in your life pass so quickly, and how at the time you experience it you are unaware of its meaning to you... For me, memories have surfaced about the joy of singing in my high school girl's choir, running in the fall through the farm roads by my high school in preparation for cross country while having great conversations with friends, flirting with all those cute shirtless boys, and occasionally perhaps stealing an apple or two. =) It's not all high school memories, a few summers ago I made a temporary close and crazy fun-loving group of friends as a staff teacher at a computer camp--and just the other day I received an email where there was an announcement of an expected baby. For a brief moment while sitting at my computer I was back at computer camp again and recalling the kooky personalities and adventures of those with whom I'd spent my summer.

It's hard to say exactly what made each of those things so great for me at the time, and it wasn't only just these three experiences I have been grateful for, but they are the most recently recalled ones. More than anything, I think through each experience either directly or indirectly there is something about it that leads to your growth as a person. I wouldn't say that the experience itself is a great epiphany, or life-changing. It's like the dropping of small stones in a great forest (to steal the words of Gandalf from Tolkien's Lord of the Rings) and each experience in its own way adds a certain gentle influence to your life. Perhaps one of the more noticeable characterstics of these times is such that each experience is recalled with much fondness and happiness; although we all know that it is not only the happy events that shape our beings.

In the conversations I'd had with Andrew, we've also noticed that it's usually dangerous to try and relive those times or hold onto them too closely, as it seems to prevent you from immersing yourself in your current situation in life and being open in your heart to the next leg of life's journey. We've also noticed that some of the things that make those past memories so dear to us now is that at the time, we simply enjoyed them and lived in them fully. There was no questioning of whatever moment of grace was at hand. We didn't even stop to think how much were were enjoying it at the time...

Now on a bit lighter side of things, one thing I have always been shamelssly nostaglic about is Hello Kitty items...the latest preference has been the "Chococat" line. Even though I have my own bona-fide whiny princess kitty Layla, I still have a few Chococat items such as a very cute matching stapler and tape holder on my desk... and recently added to the collection, Drea brought me (all the way from SanFran Chinatown) my very own Chococat pen and little photo album!
Notice Layla the real kitty on the far left, faithfully guarding the upstairs against avian and bug marauders.


Slate said...

I don't remember ever going shirtless during cross country.


Jen said...

RAe...thanks for the insightful reflection. :)